well then

I am going crazy.
Its raining outside and I really love it!

I guess it was time for some change in my life...

today, was a interesting day ... Spent the whole day shopping...
not so fun ... I strongly dislike the malls...
and rude people... But now my room smells like
new clothes : )

can't complain!

Oh, Lordie

Send me out Lord. Change people's lives Lord. Use me.

I need to interview people on this Vid... Sooo Goood

Dear God....

It's crazy to think that I've been being fed lies for a while... And actually believed them...

Last night I was told something that changed my perspective on what I had thought of Christianity all along... I guess I should stick to one church and read my bible a LOT more than I used to... Ive tried so hard to stay on the same page as everyone else when it comes to God but the reality is... I'm on a whole different level I have so much to learn.

The scariest thing is that I've tried to make so many of the struggles I'm going through about me, and question God about how he'd let this happen...
When I should be trying to see how I can learn from this and seeing how God is trying to use me through this all....

I'm slowly starting to realize that there are so many things that I do for ME that are not of God, and its NOT good at all...

oh snap...

I have TONS of work to do...

I guess we all do right?

Leaving for college:/

One of my best Friends leave for college soon...
I'm going to die.

oh... what a night...

For the past month I have fallen away from God like no other.
Watching my flame die out and be consumed by the wax of this world.
I know its not right but I have been letting my family sway my decisions on my faith.
Its a personal relationship with God yet I let them take the wheel.
What a Fool.
I finally broke down and had a long talk with some amazing people who reassured me and my relationship God. I realize now that I have a very supportive friends who will always be there to turn me back to God.
I feel bad when talking to people about my issues:/
but last night, I felt different I felt like she actually cared to listen to me.
God is going to help me through it. I just wish he put a physical being here on earth to help me.
It's not like I can hug God or cry in his arms.
Lame sauce.
God will strengthen me.
I just dont think I can handle it here any longer.